Schizophrenic Poems, Short Stories, and Thoughts

Sometimes I get lost
In the things I should say
It doesn't matter
I have trust issues anyway

Tell me a lie
So I can turn away
It doesn't matter 
I'll make it up anyway

Tell me you love me
Because my feelings are gone
It doesn't matter
It’s something I can’t say

I've accepted the fact
I will die alone
Does it matter
You wouldn’t even try

The withering loneliness
Tearing me apart
It matters
I just don’t know why

It matters! 
It matters?
Does it matter?